Day 9: Bored & just because

I have no idea why I've been sleeping late lately. My dad thinks I'm becoming anemic? I think that's how you spell it? But yeah he came to the conclusion that I'm anemic bc my lips are white and I haven't been sleeping. No pops its because my lips are chapped! Haha. But I haven't really been getting sleep. I mean yeah I sleep in because class doesn't start till 2 everyday, but that isn't enough. I've been constantly working on school work all week. I just finished my math homework and the homework I forgot to do, did 10 pages of my english workbook (there's still 20 more), I read half of my reading assignment, typed up part of my essay, and read 3 chapters from my child development book just today. I'm a hard worker man. Haha It's a good thing I did all of that. It just means less work next week. Tomorrow (or today) is Bj's 17th birthday. I look up to him so much. Even though I'm a year older. Well technically I'm "only 11 months older". Haha he won't let that go. And he gets hella defensive, I tell ya. But he's going places that's for sure. Everyone's coming here to the house for a family get together to celebrate my dad's and Bj's birthday. And then have a bible study. It's going to be packed here. I hope there's enough room. Shooot. But on Monday it's my dad's real birthday. He'll be 49! What in the world do you get a 49 year old? Ohp! Something 49er-y? Get it? He'll be 49, his favorite football team are the 49ers. I'll look for something football, clothes, or something that has to do with the beatles. Plus I'm bout to get Bj's present too. Heritage! Holler. Haha Oh, a few nights ago I decided to "rap" or at least try. I wrote two. Because I was that bored and I was that awake. Haha it was pretty late too. But here's one of em:

Breathe....
It's what you tell yourself everytime you're scared.
And you try to do it on the low like no one's there... watching you.
Each time you try it just gets worse,
And it almost feels like your hears 'bout to burst.
And everytime you find yourself in this sort of curse,
You search for relief and hope to tear...
Away from it.
You're falling uncontrollably.
In the back of your mind no one's there,
Because the person you're searching for is right here...
In the very spot that you find yourself standing.
Sweaty palms, blood rising, nervously shaking..
You take a deep breath and you've conquered the landing.

It's corny. And retarded. But WHATEVA in your face okay? Ha. I think it's tight. Then again I'm the one who wrote it. Haha so next semester I'm planning on taking at least 17 units. More or so. Because my dumbself counted the units wrong this semester so I'm only taking 11 units. So I have to step it up a notch to keep on the right track if I want to transfer. And transferring to San Diego state is my goal. I know I can do it. And I know it'll be a lot of hard work, but in the end it'll be worth it. Not just for me, but for my family to see. Ooooooooooo that's another line in the making for another "rap". Haha this past month in school has changed my way of thinking tremendously. You have no idea. I'm finally starting to feel the change in me. The change that's for the better. I'm learning who to let go and who to keep (as in trust). And technically I honestly can trust 1 to 2 people (outside my family of course). More so of 1. Il est ridiculé! I think that's how you spell ridiculous in french? But back to what I was saying. I'm not worrying about whether or not I made right or wrong decisions in my past anymore. I'm looking to the future and what it has in store. I'm gettin mines and no one can stop me! Haha I've taken up a different type of responsibility that I can no longer blame on anyone else but myself if anything goes wrong. (I've done it before but this time its hella different) I'm changing and I love it. I remember being 7 and wondering what I'd be like when I was in highschool and how it'd be. Who'd I hang out with and whether or not I'd be on the basketball team. Haha I made it through highschool, I made the basketball team, and learned what I'd be like. And look at me, I'm in college now. I wonder how my family sees me. Whether they still see a little tomboy or something. I've grown out of that phase player, THANK YOU check please! Haha I'm setting my foundation and I'll be building my future one step at a time. Man! It's amazing. Well after tomorrows bible study/family celebration thing I'm going to drive out to Grace's again to babysit Makayla. I don't want her to grow up. She's cute the way she is. Haha like forreal, it'll be weird seeing her at 10, 13, 16, then 18. Ahhh I'll be 31 when she's 18!! What the heck?!? That's freakin mind boggling to be thinking about. Haha well I better get some sleep before I become "anemic" -_- peace my geese.

P.S.
Dove silky milk chocolate is the best. I love me some of them!