Day 9: Bored & just because

I have no idea why I've been sleeping late lately. My dad thinks I'm becoming anemic? I think that's how you spell it? But yeah he came to the conclusion that I'm anemic bc my lips are white and I haven't been sleeping. No pops its because my lips are chapped! Haha. But I haven't really been getting sleep. I mean yeah I sleep in because class doesn't start till 2 everyday, but that isn't enough. I've been constantly working on school work all week. I just finished my math homework and the homework I forgot to do, did 10 pages of my english workbook (there's still 20 more), I read half of my reading assignment, typed up part of my essay, and read 3 chapters from my child development book just today. I'm a hard worker man. Haha It's a good thing I did all of that. It just means less work next week. Tomorrow (or today) is Bj's 17th birthday. I look up to him so much. Even though I'm a year older. Well technically I'm "only 11 months older". Haha he won't let that go. And he gets hella defensive, I tell ya. But he's going places that's for sure. Everyone's coming here to the house for a family get together to celebrate my dad's and Bj's birthday. And then have a bible study. It's going to be packed here. I hope there's enough room. Shooot. But on Monday it's my dad's real birthday. He'll be 49! What in the world do you get a 49 year old? Ohp! Something 49er-y? Get it? He'll be 49, his favorite football team are the 49ers. I'll look for something football, clothes, or something that has to do with the beatles. Plus I'm bout to get Bj's present too. Heritage! Holler. Haha Oh, a few nights ago I decided to "rap" or at least try. I wrote two. Because I was that bored and I was that awake. Haha it was pretty late too. But here's one of em:

Breathe....
It's what you tell yourself everytime you're scared.
And you try to do it on the low like no one's there... watching you.
Each time you try it just gets worse,
And it almost feels like your hears 'bout to burst.
And everytime you find yourself in this sort of curse,
You search for relief and hope to tear...
Away from it.
You're falling uncontrollably.
In the back of your mind no one's there,
Because the person you're searching for is right here...
In the very spot that you find yourself standing.
Sweaty palms, blood rising, nervously shaking..
You take a deep breath and you've conquered the landing.

It's corny. And retarded. But WHATEVA in your face okay? Ha. I think it's tight. Then again I'm the one who wrote it. Haha so next semester I'm planning on taking at least 17 units. More or so. Because my dumbself counted the units wrong this semester so I'm only taking 11 units. So I have to step it up a notch to keep on the right track if I want to transfer. And transferring to San Diego state is my goal. I know I can do it. And I know it'll be a lot of hard work, but in the end it'll be worth it. Not just for me, but for my family to see. Ooooooooooo that's another line in the making for another "rap". Haha this past month in school has changed my way of thinking tremendously. You have no idea. I'm finally starting to feel the change in me. The change that's for the better. I'm learning who to let go and who to keep (as in trust). And technically I honestly can trust 1 to 2 people (outside my family of course). More so of 1. Il est ridiculé! I think that's how you spell ridiculous in french? But back to what I was saying. I'm not worrying about whether or not I made right or wrong decisions in my past anymore. I'm looking to the future and what it has in store. I'm gettin mines and no one can stop me! Haha I've taken up a different type of responsibility that I can no longer blame on anyone else but myself if anything goes wrong. (I've done it before but this time its hella different) I'm changing and I love it. I remember being 7 and wondering what I'd be like when I was in highschool and how it'd be. Who'd I hang out with and whether or not I'd be on the basketball team. Haha I made it through highschool, I made the basketball team, and learned what I'd be like. And look at me, I'm in college now. I wonder how my family sees me. Whether they still see a little tomboy or something. I've grown out of that phase player, THANK YOU check please! Haha I'm setting my foundation and I'll be building my future one step at a time. Man! It's amazing. Well after tomorrows bible study/family celebration thing I'm going to drive out to Grace's again to babysit Makayla. I don't want her to grow up. She's cute the way she is. Haha like forreal, it'll be weird seeing her at 10, 13, 16, then 18. Ahhh I'll be 31 when she's 18!! What the heck?!? That's freakin mind boggling to be thinking about. Haha well I better get some sleep before I become "anemic" -_- peace my geese.

P.S.
Dove silky milk chocolate is the best. I love me some of them!

Day 8: Holy moles!

Today is Friday September 18th. I'm at Grace's house to help out and whateva. I gotta drop off 'Kayla to school then pick her up around 230. I hope it's 230, eeeek haha. I'll just do homework or something while I wait for her to get off. It's been too hot lately, what the freak. It needs to be fall already. Haha I used to love the heat but now it's getting to me. I'm starting to like the cloudy breezy weather. But, I have an english essay due october 1st and I haven't started it yet. It's an easy prompt but It's always hard for me to start an essay without a guide thing. Like in highschool. Yeah yeah I know, I'm not in highschool anymore. Boo you! I'm just sayin.. Ha. I'll start on it this weekend. Ever since I've been taking that kickboxing class, I've been eating nonstop. My metabolism is going crazy again. I loooove it haha. I used to weight 120 but I weigh like 118 now. Yay lost 2 lbs. Haha I'm not actually not worried whether or not I lose weight. Just as long as I stay in the 120 range. Then I'm good. Well I'll write more later, I'm gonna eat cause my stomach keeps yelling haaaaaa. Peace out suck face.

Day 7: I'm a blogger

Im at my cousins house in Cordelia, and all we're doing is playing old ass board games. We played dont wake daddy, topple, and jenga. Hella old. It's so weird. We basically grew up here trying to build tents out of chairs and blankets. And now we can hardly fit ourselves in one tent. Haha everytime we all got together before we went to bed someone asked, "hey you want to make a tent?" And we did. And every morning we'd wake up to a blanket draped over us and someones foot in our faces. Time flies too fast. Atchie told me the biggest change she saw in me was when we went on my second cruise. During the formal dinner. And i took them for a little drive earlier and my Tito Jay was all smiley and proud. Haha Well these monkeys went to sleep kind of early so I'm just going to do this and sleep after. Peace to the midde east ca-peeche?


10 Things You Wish You Could Say to 10 Different People Right Now:
1. You're being stupid and going back to square one. You need to start realizing these things sooner because it's beginning to have a huge effect on me. And i miss you.
2. I wish you can see how much i need you in my life. And how much I would love to see you everyday and just how much i hate him. I pray that one day you'd realize that we've been right all along.
3. Thanks for putting up with me this long. I'm very grateful to have someone as understanding as you in my life. And I don't plan on goin anywhere playeeerrr holler. haha and I miss you.
4. I'm very proud of you and even though I can't actually help with your problems, I'll always be here to lend a hand because I love you and I look up to you like no otha.
5. You are annoying and I hope you fall and break your ugly face.
6. You're too cute.
7. I'm going to be different and I'm going to show you. So please just trust me.
8. I'm blogging... LIKE A BOSS! haha
9. Lady, you need to be more chill !
10. Everything I do, is for you.

9 Things People May Not Know About You:
1. I'm ambidextrous.
2. I broke my ring toe by tripping over my own foot and hitting a wall.
3. I would rather work on a car than go shopping.
4. I used to collect comic books.
5. I absolutely can't stand cats or birds.
6. I used to live in Virginia.
7. I split my lip when I was little.
8. I have three moles on my right foot.
9. I've been to four different elementary schools in 2 years while growing up.

8 Ways To Win Your Heart:
1. Be intelligent.
2. Fit..shooot haha.
3. Independent.
4. Keep me laughing.
5. Family oriented.
6. Have your head on straight.
7. Unique.
8. Just don't be a bitch. haha

7 Things That Cross Your Mind A Lot:
1. I wonder if they miss me?
2. Why do good people make bad decisions?
3. Where will I be in six years?
4. When will our president start to actually make a change?
5. I hope I get accepted into SDSU.
6. What would happen if i died?

6 Things You Do Before You Fall Asleep (not in order):
1. Be on my phone.
2. Check what time it is.
3. Brush my teeth
4. Listen to music.
5. Wash my face.
6. Read.

5 Characteristics You Value:
1. Trust.
2. Honesty.
3. Owning up to things.
4. Wisdom.
5. Seeing the good in bad.

4 Songs to Describe Your Life:
1. Confused by Tevin Campbell
2. Family business by Kanye West
3. Dont' change by Musiq Soulchild
4. Holla if ya need me by Trey Songz

3 Things You Wish You Never Did:
1. Lie.
2. Pretend.
3. Wonder.

2 Things You Want to Do Before You Die:
1. Travel around the world and leave little things behind for my family to find, like a treasure hunt.
2. Sing and play guitar in front of a big crowd.

1 Confession:
1. I've always saw myself as an ugly duckling.

Alright well that last one isn't really a confession? I just didn't know what to put. But I do think that. Haha It's almost 3 in the morning and I have to wake up at 7. So peace easy baby !

Day 6: Blah blah blah

Well it's been a while since i wrote in here. I haven't had the time to with school and everything else. But college is cooool. I was hella nervous the first day of school. Knees & hands shakin, palms sweatin, and all. But I got over it. Natalie and Carl came to visit my first day which helped with being nervous. And everything afte that has been great so far. Umm, my kickboxing class is hella tight though. My knuckles are kind of fucked up though. Haha but it's cool because I sweat my ass off and I'm getting fit. Yee hee. I'm starting to drive my car now. Which is nice. I'm going to cut my hair today. Not too short though. Hopefully I know what i want when I get to the hair place. And hopefully it comes out right. Haha fudge muffins. I'm most likely going to not like it the first couple of days. We shall see, ya feel me? Hmmm what else do I need to say? Blah blah blah blah blaaaah. Ha alright I'll write more next time. Peace easy lemon squeezy, YUUUUUUUUUUUUP! Oh yeah Trey Songz's cd goes. I love it. Ha okay peaaaceee.